Saying “No” To Life

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I have a very dear friend named Randy.  Not too long ago, we were discussing how people say no to life.  I think I had asked him if he was doing anything for the 4th of July.  We looked at all the things people make up, in order not to participate.  Be it religion, philosophy, spirituality, dietary restrictions, etc.  Bottom line, it all boils down to unconscious fears. I am going to copy his email here in order that he gets full credit for this very profound conversation:

“I said that I wasn’t doing anything because I knew no one here that it was easy to do something with.  No, I can’t eat there. No, I can’t do that. No, I can’t say that. No, I can’t have a drink, etc.  At some point, it seems that the “no” is a “no” to life.  The philosophy seems, at some point, to get in the way of being with people and enjoying all that this world has to offer.  It seems to limit people to an extent that limits who they can be with, who and what they can enjoy.  It is a tightrope for them to walk.  Maybe it serves them, maybe it is the ideal place for them at this time.  It is jut difficult for me when I have to keep seeing what I can do when I am with them.  I hear people say that travel is so valuable and educational.  But how can you go to an area that has a beautiful and wide culinary history and great drinks and songs that are part of the culture and claim you have immersed yourself in that culture when you can only associate with those of the same beliefs, can only go to restaurants that serve a very limited (and usually different) menu from the locals.  So, I am happy for anyone to set up their lives in whatever way they see as important for them, it just requires too much thought and planning to make the trip and enjoyable and freeing for me.”

I appreciate him so much for getting into words what we (unconsciously) do to ourselves all day long.  It seems, we are always saying no.

Please head on over to Possibility Group on Facebook, or and say “hi” to Randy.  You’ll be glad you did.


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